Sterling Chronicles
Sterling Chronicles · Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Ami loves you

 Day 67

 

Just over a year ago, Ami and Sterling met for the first time. They both were captivated with each other. There was no doubt that Sterling loved Ami and Ami loved Sterling, deeply. Often when the house was too loud you would find the two of them snuggled up together watching a movie or playing a game. They found peace in the quietness together. 

 

During Sterling’s last days here with us she would come into our room and lay in Ami’s spot on his pillow and take her little naps. She found peace in the quietness of our room. Our heart breaks knowing that her naps and periods of...

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Sterling Chronicles · Sunday, September 30, 2012
Celebration

Celebration

 

The RockStar family invites you to celebrate the life of our Little RockStar, Sterling Sky Kielsmeier.

 

Monday, October 8, 2012 at 2:00 p.m.

The Fox Theatre

301 South Garey Avenue, Pomona CA 91766

Reception immediately following.

 

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made in Sterling’s honor to one of the following:

 

CHOC Children’s Hospital of Orange County

http://www.choc.org/giving/index.cfm?id=P00266

 

Team RockStar’s CHOC walk team- all donations go directly to CHOC

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Sterling Chronicles · Saturday, September 29, 2012
Goodbye, Don't go.

One of the resounding thoughts that rang through my head as I began to grieve a few short weeks ago was “I’m not ready!”. I’m not ready, or at least I wasn’t ready, but as the days rolled by and I was able to cherish so many sweet and dear memories with my beautiful daughter, one whom I love so dear, surely and ever so slowly, that thought faded away.

Until the time came, and it was like she knew, like she was saying Daddy it’s time, Papa it’ll be okay. And eventually, all pointed to the fact that she was ready, Papís I need to go. I knew she was right, the time had come, and some how I...

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Sterling Chronicles · Saturday, September 29, 2012
Consumed

Day 63

Anger has consumed me. I am angry at everything and nothing at all. I miss Sterling.  

Grief is a crazy thing. One moment I am laughing the next I am crying uncontrollably. Before I know it I am angry. Angry that this is happening. Angry that she is gone. Angry that I am watching my baby brother and his precious wife deal with all these unnatural decisions and feelings. Just flat out angry. On some weird level I am okay with the anger, at least I am feeling something. 

The anger wells up within me like a fiery furnace. One that will not be squelched.

Our journey today has been...

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  Sterling Chronicles
Sterling Chronicles · Saturday, September 29, 2012
A Note From Nana and Big Poppa

We are on a journey which we prayed we wouldn't have to take again! Darling Sterling, our hearts are hurting; our time with you has been so very short and we're not ready for you to leave us. We need more of your sweet kisses and strong hugs! We have looked forward to seeing you grow into a beautiful, loving young lady. We knew you would make a difference in this world...and you have! You have strengthened our bond as a family united in prayer and love for each other from California to Texas to Tennessee to North Carolina and beyond! You have united us with dear friends who have supported...

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  Sterling Chronicles
Sterling Chronicles · Friday, September 28, 2012
Home

Today our sweet Sterling Sky is being held tightly by her Prince Charming, the Prince of Peace Jesus Christ. She went peacefully and we miss her greatly already. ? The RockStar Family

September 24, 2009 - September 27, 2012
  Sterling Chronicles
Sterling Chronicles · Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Mother's Heart on Loss


  Do ya ever think about how many miracles you see? For instance the kindness of a stranger, finding money in a pair of pants you forgot about, the life of a child - we are surrounded every single day. The choice comes down to Do you WANT to see them? Will you let them impact you?
   When I was 10 weeks pregnant with my sweet Sterling, I was in a bad car accident that TOTALED my small car, yet the baby and I were fine. The Lord could have taken her home then.  When I was 32 weeks pregnant I went into preterm labor. He could have taken her then but didn't. There were plenty of opportunities...
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Sterling Chronicles · Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Morning Dawned

Day 61

 

It is through tear filled eyes that I sit at this computer and formulate this post. I keep thinking this is a horrible nightmare that we re going to wake up from but that doesn’t happen. I am going to be blunt we had a horrific afternoon which led to evening and on into early morning. Nothing we did made things comfortable for Sterling. The pain meds were wearing off too quickly and extreme agitation set in. There were times during the evening that I begged God to ease her pain however He saw fit. I cried silently every time I went to the bathroom. Finally at 5 am she settled down...

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Sterling Chronicles · Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Irritation at it's Finest

Day 60

 

Irritated. Irritated. Irritated. This journey has brought everyone in the RockStar house to the brink of irritation. Irritated with the cancer. Irritated with sitting by and watching this disease and how it is deteriorating or Sterling girl. The days are painfully long and the evenings are dreadfully filled with tears and agony. 

 

At this point in the journey we feel like we are having an out of body experience and we are being drug through a very muddy mirky pit. 

 

Our journey has taken us on a path we have not wanted to go on and at this moment we are ready for the next bend...

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  Sterling Chronicles
Sterling Chronicles · Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Apple Jakie's Eyes

The last few weeks I've got to spend a bunch of time with my little Sterling. I got to see her singing little made up songs, play games with her that she just thought of, got long hugs and snuggles and carried her around where ever she wanted to go. She always has questions about everything she can think of, and I try to make sure I take care at answering them. I want her to know that I care about what she is saying and just maybe my answer would brighten her day and maybe even give her some sort of insight to the world. We got to do a lot of things together, the best kind of memories an...

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