Sterling Chronicles

Migraine


Those of you who suffer with migraine headaches like me, you cringe at the very word.  The impaired vision, (I often get an actual hole missing from my sight), followed by unbelievable pain.  I describe this fun experience to not only enlighten those who are fortunate enough to NOT experience them, but more importantly to describe what life is like now.
   It's 12:22am on Saturday, October 27th, and my baby has been gone for a month.  An entire month.  I feels all too real now, the loss so true.  Some of life has picked back up, some has not.  Emotions still run very high and no doubt will for some time.  As far as life goes, it's like I'm living with a migraine, a constant hole everywhere I look.  The corner of the room where her bed once sat, the side of the car where her carseat was, the random toys and clothes we continually come across that now have no owner.  Like I said, a hole.  Today my baby has been gone for an unbearable month and though I know we'll all get through this, because I serve and very BIG God, today I reserve the right to be sad.  I reserve the right to cry, to weep, to miss my little one.  Today I don't want to be comforted or encouraged, to be told simple truths about God working everything out in the end - I KNOW that, it's just not what I need today. Today I just miss Sterling.  
   There will be days in the future where life will seem brighter, but for now, Mama Rockstar is not happy, cheerful or 'ok'.  I miss her.  Just that.
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Shannon Sprott's

Makes my heart smile that your day ended better than expected.. a positive thing.. in my thoughts & prayers. Lots of Love!

Sterling Chronicles'

Ahhhhhhhhhh Made it through this day. It was a surprisingly good one too - spend some time out, commemorating Sissy, telling her story (once or twice), saw friends, ate good food; overall a good day, much to my surprise! Now pass the Smirnoff! ;) Good night family, good night friends, night all you Rockstars out there - tomorrow will be a new day with new mercies for each of us. Love Mama Rockstar

Jenni Nolan's

Love you, Mama Rockstar!

One month with out your sweet baby girl, already? Be shitty, my friend!! This is not what you signed up for and it is NOT FAIR!! Fortunately, our life here on earth is but the blink of an eye--and we will soon spend eternity in Heaven with Sterling Sky. I can't wait to meet her!!!

xoxo,  Jen

Ilissa D\'Auria's

You will always have the right to be said, to cry, and to grieve my friend. My heart still breaks for you, for all of you. 

Sarah Henness'

Let it out. Crying is good for the soul. Jesus wept, so can you. ;). Thinking of you, crying a little. Love you.

Jessi Pressley's

LOVE you my friend!

Shannon Sprott's

In my thoughts & prayers, Sending so much LOVE to you all today.

Julie Deaton's

And though we can't take the pain away, though we so wish we could, we send you love for today <3

Marla Chauvin's

Be free to be sad and grieve, friend. That is a hole I'm thinking never really goes away. Sometimes expressing that loss is the only response that both honors the extreme value Sterling brought to you while here, and is the only response that makes sense for a mom who loved her so much. Love you.

Sterling Chronicles'

Oh very well said! Love you to bits. I also am reserving that same right.